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| Unforgiveness will only lock us up behind bars of bitterness |
The Free Dictionary simply defines Forgiveness as:
1. To excuse for a fault or an offense; pardon.
2. To renounce anger or resentment against.
Forgiveness is one issue that makes even believers uncomfortable.
We have even developed a defense to forgiveness
with the phrase, "I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST HIM OR HER." Yet in the company of an offender(s) we get uncomfortable, snobbish or even pretend we don't know the person(s) in question.
We have also developed catchy statements like, "FORGIVE BUT NEVER FORGET" or "FORGIVE, BUT NEVER TRUST AGAIN".
Even Christians that should set the standard for kingdom living have yielded to the comfortableness of worldly moral standards of forgiveness; forgiving with a grudge. This, no doubt is a dark sided standard. If I may make bold to ask, does this kind of forgiveness feel right? Does it set one free?
In one of St Paul's letters, he makes a shocking demand on the Corinthians when he asked them not only to forgive but..
"...on the contrary, you ought rather to forgive and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one be swallowed up with too much sorrow. Therefore I urge you to reaffirm your love to him."
(2 Corinthians 2:7-8).
Here Paul not only asks us to forgive our offenders, but also to comfort and encourage them. We should help them get over their guilt, in fact, we should make them comfortable if they come to our homes. We must welcome them without holding back our good will and kindness. By so doing, the person can find the face to correct his or her wrongs. Obviously, sometimes they don't make amends, but it feels good to be free from the hurt that they caused us.This clearly silences the "forgiveness" that holds grudges.
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| Practice true forgiveness |
Why is this kind of forgiveness so important?
It is important because it is the only type of forgiveness there is. Forgiveness that holds back only holds us in a cell of self consciousness, fear, sadness, bitterness and insecurity (to mention the least). It is in this type of "forgiveness" that the plot to vengeance is possible. As Children of God we know better than that.
Let us now therefore "unlearn" every other type of wasteful forgiveness and learn the true way of forgiving; the sacrificial kind of forgiveness that actually lifts off the burden of hate and replaces it with boundless freedom and joy. It will cost us, but in the end it always pays back in pure spiritual freedom.
In this END TIMES make Love a priority. Make forgiveness a lifestyle. Break the limits of hate and vengeance through forgiveness. Remember, it is our Christian duty to Love, and we can't Love without allowance for FORGIVENESS.
Shalom.
I have been following your posts for some times now and I want to commend you for ur versatility and talent. Weldon. Good job.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very touchy/sensitive topic for so many-believers and unbelievers alike. Forgiveness must indeed be total, if one must truly be free.
ReplyDeleteHowever, in a situation where you have done your bit, and your offender is still perpetuating the action which caused you pain, you will be doing yourself a disservice to hang around. You need to forgive, and just move on. One of my sista friends, a beautiful christian woman, whom I respect, and author of 'Diary of a Desperate Naija Woman' put it this way, and I agree:
"Forgiveness does not necessarily mean Relationship. I learned this from reading 'The Shack' and it has become one of my many 'truths'. Let's face it, that I have forgiven you does not mean I need to re-establish a connection with you (and vice versa).
Furthermore, I have also learned that forgiviness does not make the other person right. It just sets me FREE. Believe it or not, the object of your hatred/unforgiveness/malice, has you in bondage.
Now, why would you continue to let that be the case? Why would you continue to be a 'slave' to the one that hurt you? Why would you continue to let the devil win? Think about it."
Thanks for this beautiful share. There are many learning points here. God bless you.
First of all I can't hide my excitement that you are here...welcome Madame.
DeleteI couldn't agree with you more on this issue of forgiveness. My spirit was really thrown in the sport light as I read your book "Burning Hurt" which vividly paint a true picture of hurt, pain, retaliation, bondage to bitterness, betrayal, and finally the gradual and painful road to forgiveness.
Reading that book made me ask myself a few questions.
True forgiveness is never easy, it is worth it. The freedom to let go is far sweeter than the urge to hold on.
Forgiving and forgetting will negate your forgiving because one has forgotten forgiving for something and history will repeat itself perpetually.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading this. I found it very informative and welcoming.
In that case, I'm the bravest, strongest and happiest.
ReplyDeleteVery informative indeed